The Big Picture

Each day that we wait for our referral seems so long.  I have the calendar memorized, yet I still insist on looking at it and counting the weeks... it is becoming increasingly likely that we will not be bringing our daughter home before Christmas, maybe not even until January. 

This morning, I had a funny conversation with Matthew.  He delights in killing the bugs that find their unfortunate way into our home.  Matthew pointed to one poor deceased creature and announced that he had "sent it to heaven," to which I responded that I do not know if bugs go to heaven or not.  This led to more questions: 

Matthew:  How do we get to heaven? Is it a long way?
Me:  Well... sort of.  Our bodies die and get buried, only our souls go to heaven.  Your soul is inside of you, you can't see it.
Matthew:  But how does it get out? Where is the door?

After getting wholly unsatisfactory answers from Mommy, he finally gave up asking questions.

This left me thinking about what I will leave behind when my name is finally etched in stone: God willing, faithful children who love God and love their neighbor.   Beyond that, a lot of other things that will fade with time:  good memories, bad photos, outdated clothing... a blog book with all of my inane postings.  My impatience this year will look all the more foolish in hindsight, when my children and grandchildren read these posts and laugh at my obsession with a few months.

Thinking about The Big Picture, I shake my head and smile.