Nursery

We painted the nursery! Well... actually, I had the lady at the paint store recommend the color, I bought the paint, and my wonderful, incredible, perfect sister painted the entire room while we were in Seattle. I "helped" add the dots today, and voila! the nursery is transformed from sterile white to warm browns with word art that couldn't be more perfect.

Travel Requirement Update

The latest rumor, unconfirmed by our agency: there is now a sign at the Addis Ababa court saying that the requirement having parents appear in court for the adoption hearing has been put on hold for an indefinite time. Please join us in praying that this is correct!

Gain vs. Loss

In the many hours of adoption education that we completed, one thesis statement still nags at me: "Adoption is built on loss." Yet, is not life itself built on loss? Because we live in a sinful world, we are immersed in loss - our very lives are lost without Christ. The most acute losses in our child's life predate adoption. To me, adoption is about gain after loss -- gaining a home, gaining a family, gaining opportunities, gaining love -- and I will gain every bit as much as she will.

I appreciate the following story, shared by another adoptive family:

***They recently spoke with an Ethiopian pastor in their hometown. The pastor grew up in Addis Ababa, the capital of Ethiopia. Raised Orthodox, he became an engineer and worked in that career for six years. After being introduced to Christ, he became a believer and came to the U.S. to get a seminary education so that he can eventually return and minister to his own people. He kept thanking this family for adopting two little boys. They kept assuring him that they are the ones being given the gift.

They then asked him how he felt about people saying negative things about Americans adopting Ethiopians - what was his opinion of taking children out of their heritage and culture and raising them as Americans? He just smiled and said, "Who is saying this? Americans or Ethiopians?" They told him they had only heard it from Americans.

He said, "Yes. Americans do not know poverty. Ask any person who has seen the real situation and they will not say these things." He was very passionate about this subject. He said, "The one thing these children need is someone to call Mom and Dad and to love them and make them part of their family. That is the most important thing. Does not compare to culture." He was very clear that he believes adoption is a very good thing for his people.***

I have never seen her photo, yet my daughter is the most beautiful girl in the world to me. I have never kissed her cheek, yet I can sense its softness beneath my lips. I have never held her hand, yet I can feel her tiny fingers grasping mine. I have never heard her laugh, yet my heart fills with joy as her voice echoes in my heart. I have never heard her cry, yet I feel her pain and my heart breaks. I know her diapers stink and her temper flares. I know she will bring me joy as well as sorrow, blessings as well as challenges. I know her, yet I have never met her.

She is my daughter, and I love her. Ruth 1:16

Saving My Own Child

I just enjoyed reading this NPR artiel, Adopting a Baby from Africa, Famous or Not, by Melissa Faye Greene, and especially the concluding quote: "Adoption is not rescue, not exactly, and yet I saved the lives of these children. Writing that, I feel no sense of nobility or virtue, nothing lofty at all. I saved the lives of my own children, which is a selfish act. I saved them for myself." (Sallie Tisdale)

...And More Travel Information

The latest information is that our first trip will be at the court date, which is a couple of weeks later than the signing of the adoption contract. That is both good and bad. The good is that it is more likely that we will get to meet the birth family who is giving our daughter up for adoption, because they are required to attend court as well. The bad is that the first trip will happen on a fixed date, on short notice, and the length of time between the first and second trips will liklely be 3 - 4 weeks -- too long to stay in country, but too short to fully recouperate between trips.

In the meantime, there are a lot of rumors on the adoption wire, including reports that an agency (not ours) is challenging the new rule, seeking to delay implementation until fall, and that other agencies are advising that the rule is not final. http://ethioadoptionnews.blogspot.com/ We continue to pray!

Latest Travel Information

The latest information that we have received gives us a new adoption schedule that looks something like this:

Referral: (June?) We will receive information about a girl 0 -12 months (or, a sibling group under 3) who is available for us to adopt. We will have 10 days to review and accept this referral. 2 - 3 weeks after we accept the referral, we will both travel to Ethiopia to meet our daughter and sign the adoption contract. Our agency plans to stagger travel groups, with “first trip” (contract signing) groups one week, “second trip” (taking children home) groups the next. With travel time, both trips will take 6 - 7 calendar days.

First Trip: (June/July?) Both Jon and I will spend about 3 days “on the ground” in Ethiopia, visiting and bonding with our daughter at the Hannah’s Hope transition home. We will not be permitted to leave Hannah’s Hope with her because we will not yet be her legal parents. We will have an opportunity to experience the culture, including meals and shopping. Then, we will return home and our daughter will stay at Hannah’s Hope for approximately 8 weeks - the time that it takes for her case to work its way through the Ethiopia court and U.S. immigration systems, verifying her eligibility for adoption and our eligibility to adopt, and finalizing the adoption under both Ethiopia and U.S. law.

Second Trip: (August?) At least one of us will spend another 3 days in Ethiopia, bonding with our daughter (we will have full custody, keeping her with us at our hotel) and going to our embassy appointment to obtain her U.S. IR-3 VISA. Because of the first trip, she will be a U.S. citizen when she enters the U.S. - no need to complete an additional citizenship application once we return home. Re-adoption in our state of residence will still be necessary to obtain a new birth certificate. If her birth mother or extended family is available, we will meet them during this trip as well.

As we consider taking two trips to Ethiopia over the course of a few months, we continue to pray that the requirement will be lifted or that there will be an immediate “good” that will come out of this for us. Whatever happens, however, we know that all things are being worked together for good - “to them that love God” is about perspective. Even while we groan under the burden of an additional trip, we have “peace . . . which passeth all understanding.” (Phil. 4:6-7)

New Travel Requirements

Ethiopia has just added an additional requirement: both adoptive parents must travel to Ethiopia to meet their child in person before the adoption proceeds through the Ethiopia court system. (Until now, adoptive parents could sign a Power of Attorney and have an agent sign the adoption contract.)

At least one parent must still travel to bring the child home, about 6 - 10 weeks after the contract is signed. It is highly unlikely that Jon will be able to make the 2nd trip. This is probably true for a lot of adoptive families. Each trip means about 10 days away from home (with travel time), which presents job and childcare challenges, and costs about $3,000 per person for airfare, food, and lodging.

We will learn more tomorrow during a conference call with our agency.

"All things work together for good..." Even unforseen trips to Ethiopia that require us to hold our daughter...and then leave her behind.

Travel Immunizations

We completed our consultation with the Travel Clinic nurse this morning. Results: we each received four immunizations - seasonal flu, H1N1, polio booster, and Hep A - and Jon received a fifth, his (very late) MMR booster. Our arms are sore. We also brought home pills for typhoid immunization, and will get prescriptions filled for altitude medicine and antibiotics closer to our travel date.

Preventive health measures: $620. Not getting deathly ill while traveling: priceless.

Work, Play, Rejoice.

WORK. The bank where Jon worked for the past 4+ years was closed by the FDIC. To say that work has been challenging the past 12 months is an understatement. Although his employment continued to assist the acquiring bank with the transition, it was only a matter of time before Jon would be unemployed. Our greatest concerns were (a) whether unemployment (of any length of time) would delay our adoption plans, and (b) how far of a commute Jon would have to accept to find a new job without relocating. Both worries were for naught. On Monday, March 8, Jon begins a new position as Controller at The Fruit Company, just a short drive from home. Jon is very excited about the opportunity and looks forward to the new (good!) challenges it brings.

PLAY. After a very long travel day, we arrived home from The Big Island of Hawaii a few hours ago. Perfect location, perfect weather, perfect trip. From driving through the lush Waimea valley, to snorkeling in the chrystal water above coral reefs, not a day went by that we didn't wonder when we will go back... and with whom! On our last trip 8-odd years ago, we would never have dreamed that our next visit would include a 3-year old boy who we adore beyond words. This time, we knew that our next trip will include at least one more traveler - our beloved daughter. We love sharing the things that we enjoy with our children!

  

                                           

REJOICE. We have tried to be faithful this past year, remembering to rejoice and give praise always -- in the seemingly best of times, as well as in the seemingly worst of times. (Phil. 4)

#18 Girl/#8 Sibling!